out of the mud

2009-06-01T00:13:00.001-05:00

Today was one of those days I wish would be long forgotten or at least dismissed as "another boring day." Alas, that probably won't happen because the drama and the tears and frustration that defined the afternoon will mark this day for quite awhile as a bit more than boring. Drama is a better descriptor, I think.

There are four females living in our home, otherwise known as Kappa Alpha Estrogen. It seems at times healthy boundaries get blurred, feelings get hurt and one young lady or another begins to spew angry words and accusations that would make a sailor blush.

It's days like today that I figure, what's the use? Who cares anyway if these three girls have mutual love and respect for each other, my expectations must be too high, anyway. Besides, the oldest one is quick to remind me everyone (or no one) else is "doing it or going there or wearing it…" What do I know?

It's not like I wrote the book on Mothering 101: All You Need to Know…and Then Some.

I mean, is it really realistic to want, to truly desire these young women grow into emotionally, physically, spiritually healthy adults that are able to love and be loved? Am I expecting too much to want a great family that honors God first, loves one another and seeks to serve others?

A week or so ago, my friend Joanne was lamenting the same questions, only in her own way.

"Parenting is hard. And when it gets hard and when I'm tired and when it seems like

nothing ever changes, well, I just want to give up. I figure my hopes and dreams and expectations

of what a family should/could be must be just plain unrealistic and that maybe I should just lower the bar."

I thought I was the only one who felt this way…but it seems lots of us feel kind of discouraged sometimes. When I am without courage, when I want to just kick the ground and sort of give up I am reminded of a couple things:

My Lord loves my children far more than I do. He is even more interested in their emotional, physical and spiritual growth than I ever will be. (Whew…that does take a little pressure off.)

The Enemy loves when I get discouraged, sullen, sulky and full of self-pity…he jumps right in and echoes every negative thought I can think.

The Truth: Family is and always will be God's idea…so my desires for my family to be a great family…they aren't selfish, they are biblical. Psalm 128 reminds me that "Blessed are all who fear the Lord, who walk in His ways. You will eat the fruit of your labor; blessings and prosperity will be yours.''

More Truth: This life isn't easy, it wasn't meant to be…but I am not alone as a mom, God is working in and through my heart and in and through the hearts of my girls, too. His plans for them will not be sidetracked by my sub-par parenting nor will they be augmented by spectacularly fantastic parenting, either. I am called to fear the Lord, to walk in His ways, to talk about Him to my children and pray for them dutifully. That's it. I can trust Him to do what He says He can do and that He is sufficient.

so, what's your story?

2009-04-09T00:21:00.000-05:00

i began journaling in high school, ostensibly as a class assignment, however my love for words and the continuous flow of teen drama compelled me to continue writing beyond high school and through college. today, i journal in a specially selected notebook...the qualities of the chosen one include a spiral binding, heavy lined paper and a cool retro type cover illustration like the ones found here.

more recently, at least over the last couple of years, i have especially enjoyed blogging. i feel like the blog format allows me some freedom to have a conversation...even if it is with myself...or to provide encouragement and a morsel of humor to a reader or two that happen to stumble upon"Out of the Mud."

of course, the upside of blogging is that i can write about anything i want, on the other hand my posts tend to be sporadic and not particularly focused on any one subject area. it doesn't take long for the astute observer to conclude i am hard pressed to remain focused on any one 'thing' for any significant amount of time. apparently, there is a term for people like me...a.d.d. or a.d.h.d....back in high school 'airhead' or 'dingy blonde' was fairly accurate... i suppose i could focus all my blog posts on a.d.d....complete with 'how to' and '10 steps to...' articles.

mostly, though, i write about my life as a 'believer' or 'follower of Christ' or the older, less hip term used to describe us Jesus Freaks: 'born again Christian.' terminology aside, i do have other interests, check my facebook info page...i have a plethora of interests, but seriously, i kind of get tired of reading/writing/talking about recipes, cool new kitchen kitche, decorating my house, all the accomplishments of my overachieving husband and kids, will ferrell's latest movie and what not to wear.

i'm a thinker, i suppose, so i could examine and discuss the Palestinian/Israeli conflict, whether bailing out the banks is really a good idea, i could decry genocide in Rwanda, Sudan, or Congo...i could debate the ethics of late term abortion, discuss different treatments available for pre-, peri- and postmenopause, i could analyze the US Forest Service's current policy on prescribed burns on Forest Service lands or hold a web forum on parenting and disciplining our children...but--

each of these subjects would eventually lose my interest...unless the discussion, debate, forum or rant had the 'aroma' of Christ...then we'd need to brew more coffee and put another log on the fire. because, not only do i love to share my story...i love to hear yours...i think that is why social networks, blogs, etc intrigue me...

as for me...what i truly love to share with those willing to read or listen is how one Person, the most historic figure ever to walk the earth drew me to Him and in a single moment i realized i am not a caterpillar, but a butterfly...

i love to share the moments i experience in my work as nurse...when i see the work of His hands in the birth of a new family. how it is only because of His spirit in me that i can look upon women and children with His eyes...people whom many would pass by on the street without giving them a second thought, those who live among us who are homeless, jobless, helpless, hopeless...and how this life we live, this very hard bumpy, crusty life is worth every bump and bruise...

in a world filled with contradiction, confusion and injustice, my friend Heather (@ especially heather) describes the One that gives me a hope and a future, One whose mercy is new every morning, Who gives me a joy from within that I cannot manufacture. it's not about prosperity or the good life...it's about a peace from within based upon grace at the Cross. it's about the Greatest Story ever told.

Easter is only the beginning of the Story, will it be the beginning of your story? Everyone has one...will you tell your story to Him, to the One who gives hope and grace?

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!"
2 Corinthians 5:17

f.r.u.s.t.r.a.t.i.n.g....

2009-03-18T15:05:00.000-05:00

if you were one of the lucky readers who tried to read my last post and found it disappearing off and on today...blame it on the author's rather lame blogging/computer/html skills. i use word2007 to publish and it is sometimes f.r.u.s.t.r.a.t.i.n.g!

i really enjoy writing and the creative outlet blogging provides is wonderful, it's just that my blogging platform or process or whatever you want to call it is f.r.u.s.t.r.a.t.i.n.g!

i took a break from blogging a while ago b/c i got so f.r.u.s.t.r.a.t.e.d.

i am not ready to take another break...but there has to be an easier, more efficient way to get a blog post out there!
Any suggestions, thoughts or encouragement???

memory monday…or tuesday…no, wednesday

2009-03-18T14:34:00.000-05:00

My bloggy friend, Joanne at The Simple Wife hosts Memory Monday…and every Monday I think to myself 'I would sure like to join in the fun.' So, even though it is Tuesday {ok, now Wednesday!} I am going to join in with my verse for this week…and next Monday (if all goes well) I will come back and type it in from memory.

For me there is always the temptation to complain about my situation, then in an effort to dig myself out of the whiner's pit I try to earn favor with God and man through actions or works. However; to the astute observer, my efforts are disingenuous at best, pure hypocrisy at worst. So, as I endeavor this week not just to memorize this group of words, I pray my heart would be transformed by them and my words and actions would reflect what His word has done inside.

Well, that sounds all fluffy and spiritual, doesn't it?

Let's put some modern day meat on this scripture …what does this look like today, NOW?

Wesley's commentary expands on this verse quite well…[modern girl application in brackets]

To do justly - to render to every one their due, superiors, equals, inferiors, to be equal to all, and oppress none

[Easy application: drive courteously on the streets of Lincoln, yield the right of way when applicable.]

[Challenge application: Oppress none…thinking on this one, much less applying it would keep me up for d.a.y.s. No wonder I need Jesus.]

To love mercy - to be kind, merciful and compassionate to all, not using severity towards any

[Easy app: snuggling with my children after school and listening to them talk about their busy day.]

[Challenge app: Not using severity towards any…does that include politicians? No wonder I need Jesus.]

Walk humbly with thy God - keep up a constant fellowship with God, by humble, holy faith.

[Kind of easy app: daily prayer and quiet time, reading scripture and journaling…I love to have my QT with God, but sometimes it seems life gets in the way and I am off and running for the day.]

[Challenge app: Walk humbly with thy God…this means I have to trust Him with everything, doesn't it? No wonder I need Jesus.]

Oh, and this verse is from a cute scripture memory packet from a very creative artist, Jeanne Winters. Her gift collection, simply inspiring
is featured at Hallmark Gold Crown Stores. You can read more about Jeanne at her blog here.

For the joy!

ab

i'm not who i was...

2009-02-16T18:44:00.000-06:00

as we get older we all change in one way or another...we get shorter, taller, greyer, sadder, happier...you get the picture. but for me, the most significant change in me occurred in the fall of 1993 when i made the decision to walk away from a former lifestyle apart from Christ into a journey of which i had no idea how it would look or what the experience would be.

so far, i can tell you i am so very glad Christ pursued me with such vigor and persistence as to send His own into my path that i would meet Him in the pages of Scripture over and over again. when i didn't know what to do or what to believe, His people, my new friends would point me to Scripture. there were no long philosophical debates, no deep unanswerable questions posed, no esoteric what if's...just the Truth of the Bible to meet me where i was in the fall of 1993. where was i? i was a single mom with no college education, a checkbook with about $150 and a minimum wage job at the college rec center. i lived in student housing and rode a bike around my college town because i didn't own a car.

clarity...in a moment of clarity i began to understand without God my life would essentially remain the same, even if I had a college degree, my own car and $15,000 in my checking account...i would still be without Hope. so i bent down on my knees, for the first time in my life and spoke to God, confessing every sin i could remember and asking Him to remind me of the ones i had chosen to forget. after what seemed like hours i rose from my knees, and climbed into my bed, exhausted. the next morning i woke early and opened my Bible, sat with my journal and wrote out my first prayer as a new Believer in Christ...the evidence was there...i realized...i'm not who i was.

Mighty to Save...Laura Story

2009-01-27T10:56:00.000-06:00

laura and martin's story will encourage you to remember HE is MigHty to SaVE...whatever is on your plate today...the ONe wHO Rose and ConquEREd the gRAve...the One who SpokE the sTARs into place...can handle it. Believe Him...Trust Him.

[vodpod id=ExternalVideo.775696&w=425&h=350&fv=%26rel%3D0%26border%3D0%26]

more about "Mighty to Save...Laura Story", posted with vodpod

Facebook | Casting Crowns

2009-01-25T01:32:00.000-06:00

I think is one of the best songs out there right now...all genres, all the time

[vodpod id=ExternalVideo.774685&w=425&h=350&fv=%26rel%3D0%26border%3D0%26]

more about "Facebook | Casting Crowns", posted with vodpod

Not to do list 2009…

2009-01-16T14:17:00.000-06:00

2008 is but a memory...and the new year beckons. I love January. To me it is 31 days of possibility....to remake, renew, repurpose. Each new year offers a moment of beginning, a place to start fresh…many of us start the new year with a clean slate and a TO DO
list.

Traditionalist that I am, I scratched out a simple TO DO 2009
list…but what about the alternative? What about a
[NOT TO DO}
list? I think there's some real potential in a {NOT TO DO}
list.

Here's what I've decided I'm not going to do in 2009:

{NOT TO DO 2009}

1. I am not going to use my credit card for stuff I think I want (but don't really need.)

2. I am not going to forget to return dvds to Blockbuster.

3. I am not going to make a promise I cannot keep.

4. I am not going to miss out on fun activities with my girls because there are dishes or laundry to do.

5. I am not going to say 'yes' when I really mean 'no, thanks.'

Oh, and my TO DO 2009 list…

TO DO 2009

1. Save more than we spend...way more. (like that's a shocker)

2. Choose joy. (because the alternative is yucky)

3. Be inspired. (I'm a labor and delivery nurse...this is an easy one)

4. Believe God. (...why I struggle with this I'll never know this side of heaven_)

5. Give generously. (of my time, talents and treasures...but not my chocolate)

Kind of a broad, rather vague list, I know...the details will come over the remaining days in January. I do have a few very specific projects I'd like to complete, but it's so much more interesting beginning with a wide, big picture view of the coming year.

Words…

2008-07-26T20:18:00.000-05:00

Took a little vaca from blogging per the request of family…they were running out of food and clean underwear. I'm all caught up now and back at it…

I like to visit Joanne at the Simple Wife every so often and I found Wordle. It's the coolest thing ever, especially if you're a Wordie. (Kind of like a Foodie, only with Words.) I come from a long line of educators, many of them English teachers…so reading, writing and doing stuff with words like crosswords and playing Scrabble begins early. Here is my word picture custom made from the words on this blog, just click on the small image to link to the site. This was way fun to make…my mind is going crazy with project ideas…t-shirt iron-ons, wall art, door decorations….

WFMW: Ubiquitous Capture…

2008-01-30T15:08:00.000-06:00

u·biq·ui·tous (yōō-bĭk'wĭ-təs) adj. Being or seeming to be everywhere at the same time; omnipresent.

cap·ture (kāp'chər) v. To enter (data) into a computer for processing or storage.

If you've ever wondered what it's like be ADD, think about it this way…your brain processes like a Pentium but has 2 MBs of RAM. I don't really know what that means in computer speak, but in my reality it means I am constantly thinking and processing information, but am unable to capture and remember most of what I have been processing and thinking about.

This is what is going on in my brain over a period of say…30 seconds: I need to remember to drop off the library books…where's my library card?...Since Hobby Lobby is near the library I can pick up a Valentine's craft for the girls…but I get so distracted in there, I'll have to set the timer on my watch…what time is the Brownie meeting tonight?....I should wash the sheets from Lily and Emily's beds today…I'm out of detergent…I'll remember to pick some up at big box discount store…On my way to big box discount store I'll put gas in the van…but the checkbook needs balanced first…I can do that tomorrow after the meeting at work…what time is that happening?...When does my RN license renew…do I have enough continuing education hours?...does graduate coursework count?...…AND this stream of thoughts goes on and on all day.

How does a mostly stay at home mom of three girls who are involved in school and various activities and whose dear husband travels frequently keep her act somewhat together when her mind is racing like this? I have an especially useful tool for
ubiquitous capture of pesky thoughts, imaginings, wonderings and reminders: a small notebook.

I keep my notebook with me at all times and capture my ideas, thoughts and thinks in one place to be processed further or deleted. Result: mind like water. My mind is cleared of thoughts, ideas and junk so I can think about what is important now. I don't have to tell my children to "be quiet so Mommy can think" anymore…I say "Let Mom write this thought down real quick, then I can give you my full attention."

For more on ubiquitous capture and Zen to Done, see Leo's blog Zen Habits.

Shannon at Rocks in My Dryer sponsors WFMW where you can find more ideas that work!

Simplify and Organize…

2008-01-24T21:40:00.000-06:00

I have been on this mission from the Lord…literally…to gain some sense of order and simplicity in our home. I have spent the last several weeks decluttering, cleaning, sorting, organizing and thinking about the systems I have in place to help my family and me to function well. I have learned so much…I am so thankful somebody out there invented flickr! For those of us that are visual learners, flickr is a blessing! My favorite groups are Work Spaces, Craft Rooms, Pretty Organized and Corners of My Home.

This whole organize my home/life/family journey began last fall when I began to seek out my calling as a wife, mother and keeper of the home. I have so much to tell about what I've learned…but for now I'll just post this and scooch my tired body to bed. Tomorrow I go to work…and on a labor and delivery unit on a Friday it promises to be a busy day…I'll need my rest!

The picture above of my journal, planner and notebook. I would like to throw some link love to Leo at Zen Habits. My favorite post, Zen to Done is probably one of the most influential productivity/organization resources I have come across. Basically, Leo has synthesized David Allen's process of Getting Things Done + Flylady's concept of routines + Stephen Covey's values based priorities into his e-book ZTD (Zen to Done.) The system is perfect for me…fits all the aspects of my life and is implementable. On a personal note…I have ADD, Type 1 and being organized, focused and productive focused is practically impossible very challenging for me…ZTD allows for my personality quirks and gives me freedom to be the creative, spontaneously sidetracked person I was created to be…and still get the laundry done and pick my kids up from school on time!

A Special Birthday Celebration…

2008-01-09T04:41:00.000-06:00

Works for Me Wednesday…BACKWARDS Edition!

Here's how it works…The tables are turned and instead of me giving advice or resolving a problem I get to ask you to help me with a question or problem! And just in the nick of time, too!

Here's the mission: Help me plan a memorable 16^th birthday celebration for my firstborn daughter!

The vision: A fun celebratory event that marks her passage from girlhood to young womanhood.

I've been brainstorming and here's what I've come up with so far:

The whole event could actually stretch over a weekend…her birthday is on Sunday.

Friday evening I have given to her to plan…she is thinking of going to the high school basketball game with her friends and then maybe out to dinner, home by 11pm curfew.

Saturday at noon I am going to "kidnap" her and two of her closest friends and we are going on a surprise road trip to Kansas City for a girlie weekend…but what to do, where to go in KC…on a fairly limited budget? Maybe I'll splurge for special hotel accommodations, like on the Plaza or Crown Center…but what else could we do?

After church on Sunday and a delicious breakfast…but where?

This is where everything gets fuzzy…I want to have a special family time birthday dinner on Sunday evening when we return home…but maybe that's too much.

Kaylie is the first of three girls…so I want to establish some sort of faith centered tradition with this birthday. I didn't do so hot with 13…it was pretty lame.

I would like to make a special memory book. This week Birthday Girl is to compile a list of people who she feels have thus far influenced her life in one way or another…either spiritually, academically, athletically or even artistically. These are people she knows and who know her…teachers, mentors, fellow students. I plan to scan the list and will be sending letters to these individuals to write a special birthday note of encouragement and wisdom to Kaylie. Some of these individuals will have a strong faith, others not so much but have loved her and walked with her in some way…it's just that I am not sure what to write in this letter of invitation. Should I just email them or snail mail? What do I do with them when I receive them? Should I make a special scrapbook with them?

Gift ideas: a hope chest and/or a charm bracelet. Both could be utilized as external signification of this milestone.

Another idea: writing a special prayer for her and presenting it with the letters and scrapbook.

Finally…how do I organize all these thoughts and prioritize them…then how do I actually implement the plan!

Help! Do you have any ideas to share? Were there special moments you created for your daughter or maybe that you remember from a special birthday?

Shannon and other bloggers at Rocks in My Dryer could use your creative insight into the many problems and dilemmas that plague the internets…find them here.

Oh, and I vote that Shannon tosses the empty DVD cases in the trash…call it a 27 thing Boogie and move on girl!

Christmas Greetings

2007-12-25T15:06:00.000-06:00

May the hope and peace of Christmas be yours today and always.

It’s 4:28 a.m. and…

2007-12-15T05:41:00.000-06:00

…for some Blessed reason I am awake…not that I have been sleeping and am now awake…but that I am awake because I have not been sleeping.

I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!

I stumbled on Confessions of a Pioneer Woman last week, bookmarked it to come back to when I had time because I knew I would need time to read it. I knew if I started reading I wouldn't be able to stop…so when I started reading at 1am I foolishly promised myself I would "stop" after "just a couple entries." Liar. I am a sucker for a good love story…but even more so when it is a real one. I like real. I like authenticity and I like practical. Being awake now and not having been asleep when I should have been is not exactly practical…but just one more entry…

I have discovered the Holy Grail of love stories in the blogosphere and because you are my friend, you one reader out there, I'm going to tell you about what I have discovered…Confessions of a Pioneer Woman's story of how she met and fell in love with her Marlboro Man…Black Heels to Tractor Wheels: A Love Story. It's the epic saga of 'city girl finds love in the Oklahoma prairie':

As our eleventh anniversary approaches, I find myself reflecting on the circumstances that brought Marlboro Man and me together. So grab a Diet Dr. Pepper, hang on to your hat, and come along for the ride!

I started with the beginning sans Diet Dr. Pepper (eww), and read all the way to here. The best place to begin is with the archives, though. All the posts are in one spot and you can read 'til your heart's content. Just so you know…she's not done, it's a work in progress and you'll have to wait patiently for the next installment…and you don't know when she'll write…or how long it will be…but it's worth the wait.

If you decide to jump in…a few words of caution:

If you love good photography, especially of cattle, cowboys, kids, horses and prairie…make sure you have ample time to visit her site…you'll be there a while.

If you have a rich sense of humor, enjoy good writing and witty redheads…make sure you have ample time to visit, you'll be there a while.

If you are (even in the loosest sense) a 'foodie' you will find yourself compelled to visit P-dub's other site The Pioneer Woman Cooks…make sure you have ample time to visit, you'll be there a while.

Find, steal, beg or borrow the time…and enjoy.

What We Did on Our Snow Day

2007-12-13T00:18:00.000-06:00

Make a scrapbook!

Works for Me Wednesday…Holiday Music on Pandora

2007-12-12T14:03:00.000-06:00

Do you love music?

I do!! Can't sing much, can't play much, but I do listen much. I especially love holiday music playing in my home while I busy myself with crafts, cooking and kids! As much as I love holiday music, how many versions of "O Holy Night" can there be? And how many ways can "What Child is This" be arranged and performed…tastefully? And my poor Amy Grant holiday CDs are so scratched from being drug from the van to the house to the playroom…do I really want to buy another copy (my 3^rd) only to listen to it for about 13 more days? Hmm…how to solve the dilemma?

Dilemma solved…Pandora radio from the Music Genome Project is a free internet radio site I discovered last summer:

Pandora is a music discovery service designed to help you enjoy music you already know, and to help you discover new music you'll love. It's powered by the most comprehensive analysis of music ever undertaken, the Music Genome Project: a crazy project started back in early 2000 to capture the complex musical DNA of songs using a large team of highly-trained musicians. Just tell us one of your favorite songs or artists and we'll launch a streaming station to explore that part of the musical universe. The name Pandora means "all gifted" in Greek. In ancient Greek mythology, Pandora received many gifts from the gods, including the gift of music, from Apollo. She was also, as we all know, insatiably curious. Unlike those gods of old, however, we celebrate that virtue and have made it our mission to reward the musically curious among us with a never-ending experience of music discovery. It's also important to note that at the bottom of Pandora's box was Hope...

I have had the pleasure of listening to many of my favorite musical genres…folk, country, contemporary Christian, '80s, classical, alternative, jazz. Registration is free, I don't receive tons of annoying emails or spam and if you hear a song you absolutely have to own Pandora has links to itunes and amazon. Register (for free) and begin creating your own radio station. No commercials, family friendly and only the music you like! You guide Pandora with thumbs up or down to the next song! The FAQ link here can answer any questions you might have regarding registration, music licensing, software or hardware requirements, etc.

And Pandora's latest and greatest addition…holiday music!! I don't have to purchase anything, yet I am able to enjoy my favorite holiday music from Amy Grant, Michael W. Smith, Josh Groban, Manheim Steamroller, John Tesh and other favorites while discovering new artists…commercial free. I am hooked!

Rocks in My Dryer hosts Works for Me Wednesday…this is my first time participating, although I have lurked for a long time. Follow the link to see other creative ideas from Works for Me Wednesday bloggers. You will soon see why this blog carnival continues to grow and grow and grow…

Advent Conspiracy…

2007-11-25T21:23:00.000-06:00

There's a conspiracy underway…and I don't think it will end anytime soon.

I think we could agree we are all on a journey, searching…and it seems the holiday season exacerbates this searching feeling inside.

Unless the searching feeling has been satisfied. By the One who satisfies.

The One who satisfies came to us as a babe in a manger over 2000 years ago; today we celebrate His birth as Christmas. Maybe it's me, but somewhere along the way celebrating Christ's birth (aka Christmas) was hijacked by the searching monster. In the United States the "holiday season" begins at Halloween (or before), is punctuated by the Big Feast (aka Thanksgiving) in which we gorge ourselves on scandalous amounts of food and ends with the grand finale on Christmas Day. For many, Christmas Day has become a fest of consuming…of spending scandalous amounts of money on stuff we don't really need in search of something we really do need. We make our lists, check them twice and head out to Wal*mart in search of…something.

Christ's birth (aka Christmas) was meant to transform the world…not our credit rating. Why all this consuming during the holiday season? And it's not just about buying gifts, either. There's the new pots and pans to be purchased to cook all the extra food we are cooking, the new furniture for the people who are coming to visit…there's the new clothes to buy for the parties we have to attend…there's the wrapping paper and tape and ribbons to buy to wrap all the gifts we've purchased. And the $29.99 gallon of peanut oil to fry the $10.00 turkey. But you can use the oil over and over. Who fries food these days besides McDonald's?

Now, I may be preaching to the choir…or maybe I'm just talking out loud to myself…you may have all this figured out. But way back in early October, I was shopping the local *big box discount store* for Halloween candy and I noticed Christmas décor and stuff in the aisle next to the princess and fairy costumes. The confused look on my face must have mirrored that on my children's. "What's the Christmas stuff for Mommy?" "Oh, it just wouldn't be Halloween without a few Christmas decorations, would it, honey?" I decided I had had enough of the whole holiday consumer scene.

What if, as followers of Christ we would treat the holidays as the Holy Days they are? What if we would consider stopping the busyness…to slow down and listen to the One who satisfies? What if our transformed hearts would focus out on others, sharing the Hope that satisfies? This sounds great; you say…I want something different this year…but how?

Advent Conspiracy is a great place to start. Advent Conspiracy is an international movement restoring the scandal of Christmas by worshipping Jesus through compassion, not consumption. This page has some specific ideas for relational giving.

What Would Jesus Buy? is a secular docu-comedy about the commercialization of Christmas. It's from producer Morgan Spurlock ("Super size Me") and has received very positive reviews from Christianity Today and Beliefnet.com among others.

Catalyst Church in Kent, Ohio has taken the Advent Conspiracy to a new level…check out Christmas in Kent.org.

Rick McKinley's blog (Imago Dei Community) is here…read The Baby is Coming and check out Imago Dei's site.

Darryl at DashHouse.com has posted his column from Christian Week.

Here in my town three churches have formed Christmas on 84^th Street…here's the site for inspiration.

Inspiration for Celebrating Christ in Your Home:

What about Santa Claus? We began celebrating Saint Nicholas Day many years ago. Pastor Ralph Wilson at Joyful Heart Renewal Ministries has written a lovely article about Nicholas, find it here. Many of you may already know the story, I had never heard "the truth about Santa" until I was a Christ follower! For details on our family St. Nicholas celebration see Treasured Traditions.

And this link to Simpleliving.org is a wonderful Epiphany resource…a great way to signify the close of the Christmas season.

Joanne at The Simple Wife has an Advent Countdown with daily treasures to share with her children. The project page has the how-to. I love the simplicity and the message…this project reminds me of Resurrection Eggs…but that's for another special Holy Day!

A Season of Gratitude

2007-11-25T15:52:00.000-06:00

Over the past weeks I have been writing down what I am giving thanks for this season…

I am thankful for God and all that He is…I am thankful for His gift of grace and mercy to me… for family and friends He has provided…my husband and our daughters…a healthy holiday for our family…our home…for financial provision to pay off debt…for my calling as a mother and wife and nurse…for being part of a church home here in Nebraska…I am thankful for the friendships we have made along the way and praying for new, deep friendships to walk along the road with…I am thankful for the first snow! and the firewood we were able to gather this summer to enjoy this winter…for being able to work part time so I can be home for the kids as much as possible…for the few days we were able to spend at Disneyland just before Christmas last year (before Emily's surprise surgery)…and for Christmas Day '06 with caring staff, nurses and doctors at Children's Hospital Orange County taking care of Emily (and us)…and for the love and warmth we received from Orange County Ronald McDonald house…I am thankful Emily has recovered fully from surgery and she has remained free from any further complications from the tumor…I am thankful we have had the opportunity to give to others in need…and I am thankful this season of gratitude is not just a day or moment or calendar event, but an attitude of the heart. It is a heart attitude that's not "gutted out" or from following the latest three step self improvement plan, but a heart attitude graciously provided by a loving God who lives in me.

Check out these promises…

“I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean;I will cleanse you from all your impurities and from all your idols.I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you;I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.And I will put my Spirit in you and move youto follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws.You will live in the land I gave your forefathers;you will be my people, and I will be your God.”Ezekiel 36:25-28

Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire…

2007-11-09T02:15:00.000-06:00

I am very excited to be participating in BooMama's Christmas Tour of Homes this year. There's going to be lots of folks joining in on the fun…how about you? I have placed the bloggy button in the sidebar so you can click on over to BooMama's site to see what all the fuss is about!

There's going to be lots of laughter and fun, to be sure! Save the date…December 17^th and see what the internets are doing to celebrate the season! Better yet, grab your camera, shoot some shots of your home and be a part of a blogosphere celebration!

Taking a Break

2007-10-27T13:46:00.000-05:00

So my husband and I are on a mission, a gazelle like mission; to reduce debt and become better stewards of the treasures we have been given. Because I am a fairly intense person (I usually approach a project or idea with a full on intensity second to only to my pursuit of God) I have been reading just about anything I can get my hands on about living a simpler, more frugal life. A quick net search for personal finance blogs yielded some very informative and interesting sites. I have provided links to two sites I have visited and read fairly regularly in my sidebar, there are others I have found as well, but just haven't linked them yet.

A theme I have found to come up fairly frequently on many sites has been the conversation about stay at home parent vs working outside the home parent tangled up with the issue of childcare. A recent post at beingfrugal.net intrigued me enough to comment. Another site, brip, blap had a similar conversation going and I was decided to throw my two cents in as well. And finally, The Simple Dollar has a book club; we are reading Your Money or Your Life, by Dominguez and once again a post, or rather the comments following the post compelled me to join in the conversation.

I don't think this conversation (the stay at home parent vs. working outside the home parent) can ever fully be resolved, we are all much too stubborn and convicted in our own minds about what is right or wrong, even in the face of research and statistics.

The Truth About Me…part 2

2007-10-11T22:14:00.000-05:00

The first time I learned The Truth About Me was the fall of 1993 and I was a single mom and a student at Colorado State University. I had made friends with Allison, who other than her annoying habit of bringing every conversation back Jesus, was on all accounts "normal". Our personalities seemed to click and we often sat for hours chatting while our children played together. Over the course of time, however a significant contrast between us became apparent. She had something I did not and I could see the difference lived out in her life and family…and on her face. Allison radiated Christ. Something happens when an unbeliever (me) spends time with someone who has the living God dwelling inside them (Allison). Either you are drawn the presence of the Holy Spirit in that person or the Presence is so uncomfortable for you that you find ways to avoid them or even end the relationship. I was drawn into His Presence.

Unbeknownst to me, God had been preparing my heart and He began to reveal Himself through my conversations with Allison. I had begun an inward journey and was searching for answers to the Big Questions. I was able to understand a lot about God but I had a hard time understanding on a deeper level I was separated from God. I knew I wasn't perfect, a quick survey of my present circumstances revealed that quite well, but understanding my "goodness" wasn't even close to being good enough for God…was disturbing.

My search led me to scripture and I was met by a holy God. Since I did not grow up "in the Church" reading the "great stories" of the Bible were fresh and new for me. Yet, I wanted to know why Knowing God made Alison so different from me knowing about God.

God met me in my little apartment in the evening hours as I read His Word. I remember the very moment when I realized I would one day give an account of myself to God…it was if time stopped. Every moment, every decision, every s.i.n. would be laid before me and I would be held accountable. I'm no mathematician, but on a deeper level I finally understood [my sin] > [all the good stuff I will ever do]. I was broken. I was afraid. I cried. I could feel my heart aching because I could see there was no way I was going to be able to fix the situation I was in.

It was Romans 14:11, 12 It is written: "'As surely as I live,' says the Lord, 'every knee will bow before Me; every tongue will confess to God.'" So then, each of us will give an account of himself to God
that brought me to my knees. I was absolutely powerless to remedy my situation. There existed a chasm between a holy God and me I was powerless to cross. There existed no action I could do to change this Truth and there was not one person on the planet that could help me. And in that moment I sensed I was alone with God.

I continued to read, flipping pages from Old Testament to New Testament…hoping to find something in the pages of scripture that would soothe the very real ache I held in my body. I quickly scanned Psalms and Proverbs. Nothing. I looked in Revelation…it was if it was written in Spanish. I read a little in Daniel, Isaiah, Jeremiah. It was fear that gripped me…the chasm could not be navigated by my good deeds, self-improvement techniques or promises to straighten up. I feared I was too late…and I feared God was too holy and I was too sinful.

With breathless hope I turned to the first chapter of Matthew and began to skim the pages. And then I read "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." I read it again. And again. And once again. I knew a moment of decision had come and I agreed with God about The Truth About Me. It was settled the chasm was closed and I ran to Him for the rest He promised. The ache was no longer there, it had been replaced by a sense of peace I had never before known. I was experiencing the unmerited grace of forgiveness from a holy God. I rested there, on the floor of my apartment for hours, in complete silence and awe.

The Truth About Me…part 1

2007-10-05T14:55:00.000-05:00

In our small group we are reading a book that is having a rather profound impact on my heart and my relationship with Christ. It's called True Faced: Trust God and Others With Who You Really Are. This post won't really be a book review, but rather how God is using this book to teach me the Truth About Me.

In addition to reading Scripture, I can sincerely tell you I have read every "how to be a better Christian wife/mother/sister/hostess/football fan" book ad nauseum since I decided to follow Jesus in 1993. I am a full on kind of person and when I pursue something it is with passion and intention, thus the extensive reading list. But over the last couple of years, beginning probably around 2004ish I began to sense there must be something more, something I am missing…my relationship with my God seemed…distant. I wanted change, growth, maturity, holiness, godliness…to be like Christ, to be Godly, to live the disciplines…I wanted to please Him above all else.

For those of us on this journey of following Christ, the journey is one of choices. At some point between 1993 and the early 2000s I made a choice. I made a choice between two divergent paths in this journey with God: on the left-- the path of Pleasing God and on the right-- the path of Trusting God. There is no third choice; no "door #3" and one cannot jump back and forth between the two paths. These two paths represent the inner motives of the heart, the purpose behind the practice. Ultimately, motives become values and values become action. I chose the Pleasing God path. For me, the Trusting God path seemed so esoteric, so "out there", so intangible…and kind of scary. But the Pleasing God path is one of action, it is about experience, to many it's the sold out for God way to go! Passionately, I set my foot on this path and the journey began.

True Faced describes the Pleasing God path as one that leads to the Room of Good Intentions. Over the entrance to the room a sign reads "Striving to Be All That God Wants Me to Be" and to enter this room one must turn the knob of Effort. From the beginning of my walk my deepest desire has been to be the person God intends me to be, to be the person He has called me to be. It makes sense I would grab the Knob of Effort with gusto and walk right in. …I will be all He wants me to be…whatever it looks like, whatever it takes…I want to please Him! My walk with God will be just like in the books I've read, it will be like Paul and Peter, Ruth and Naomi. My goal is to be godly, I will persevere, I will be disciplined, I will fast and pray and do Bible Studies…and we will have this close relationship I have always wanted with God. And I became comfortable in the Room of Good Intentions…at least for a while. Then I got tired. Real tired. There seemed to be this rather uncomfortable, but permanent mask adhered to my face and on the faces of others in the room. When we inquire among each other "How is it going? How are you doing?" a pained "Everything's fine, just fine, we're doing good, yup, pretty good" echoes among us all in this Room of Good Intentions.

I lived in the Room of Good Intentions for quite some time…a looong time. I invested in relationships that seemed to go beyond the mask, but in Truth the masks remained. My experience in the Room of Good Intentions was littered with half used homeschool supplies, Bible Studies left incomplete, futile attempts at perfect tea parties, gallons of mismatched paints and fabric for decorating, scratched up mediocre Christian music CDs and multiple copies of the Bible in the search to find the most accurate version to carry to church. I began to feel stifled…the mask was on pretty tight. And I claimed to be authentic. I was tired. Very tired…of myself, of the others in the Room and of feeling like I was never doing enough, never getting it quite together. There always seemed to be this cloud over me, this nagging feeling I will never be the person God intends me to be. The intimate walk I thought I would experience after choosing Christ seemed to have faded into the pages of the well intentioned books I had read and placed upon the dusty bookshelves in the basement. All the concepts and strategies I had read about had ultimately left me…unchanged.

NOTE: Over the next few days/week I will be working through The Truth About Me….and I won't not post for months, I just need to process stuff a little…this is too exciting to keep inside, just getting it out in a coherent manner is a longer process than I thought… Jab

2007-06-04T17:48:00.000-05:00

I moved!

New digs at Wordpress.com

http://outofthemud.wordpress.com/

See you there...I'm not all the way moved in, but make yourself at home anyway.

2007-06-04T00:51:00.000-05:00

The Journey Inward...

Faith...my response to God’s presence in my life.

Journey…a process or pursuit.

This morning in Sunday School (actually it is called “Discovery Class” individuals considering membership at our church go through this class) we discussed a book titled The Critical Journey by Janet Hagberg and Robert Guelich (Second Edition, Sheffield Publishing 2005). In the book, the authors examine the journey we embark upon when we respond to the presence of God in our lives. I have not read this book and this post is really just my thinking out loud...a lot of thought generated by a discussion and diagram.

The spiritual journey, as described by Hagberg and Guelich is based on the stage-model theory, of which I will direct you to this page for more on that topic and a more thorough discussion of the book by someone who has actually read the entire text.

Through the magic of computers, I was able to sort of reproduce the diagram from our handout.

All credit to the authors for the original and this reproduction.

The Wall…as shown in this diagram should really be a dark line only, but the idea remains. Most of us cycle from stage 2 to 3…learning and serving and learning and serving and…well you get the point. But, to grow, to journey deeper with God, we have to get past The Wall. And the only way out…is through.

And that is what got me to really thinking today... for some time now I’ve been hanging out at the Wall. The Wall is kind of comfortable, you don’t go too deep, don’t feel too much pain, you coast. I’ve been through the wall before, yes, but only long enough to journey inward and outward and back to learning and serving and learning and serving. In some ways, it has been an easy place to stay because going through the wall is not without pain. But remaining at the Wall is painful, too, because metaphorically you just “bang your head on it” but only hard enough to bruise yourself, not hard enough to actually break through…and that, my friend is misery.

My journey over the last two years (at least) has been a journey through the Wall. I mean I had been hanging out, like I said before, but I got bored, frustrated and miserable. I had been getting frustrated with the learning and serving routine, I did not believe the pinnacle of spiritual maturity rested in my “Christian Activity Resume.” I began to doubt and question what I believed; why I believed what I believed, wondered what was it that was truly essential in my relationship with Christ and what was clutter I picked up along the way. Was I a Christian or a Christ-follower…is there a difference? My quiet times seemed to be another activity to complete, rather than a time to connect with my Lord. I had been unsettled and restless. I yearned for something deeper, but was too fearful/lazy/comfortable/uncomfortable/proud to go through the Wall. It took a crisis to push me through…and then another one…and then another one.

I might not have known I was “at the Wall” but I did know I was not really growing or going deeper with God…and I wanted to, but knew it would take something more than just "wanting" it for true spiritual growth to happen. So I prayed. I asked God to do whatever it takes to draw me closer to Him…whatever it takes so that I would grow and trust Him more…whatever it looks like and whatever it takes…I yearned to be in a new place with Him.

That is a hard prayer to pray, but trusting Him is harder. I knew He would answer that prayer, I had no idea what the answer(s) would look like…I just had to trust Him.

So what happened?

On this journey inward there has been pain, loss, joy, peace, grace, sadness, fear, gratitude…you know, the messy stuff of life we all deal with. As I expected. But in this whole mess, I have experienced a deepness with the Lord I could have only experienced by journeying through the Wall. This place, which I think is stage 4, is hard to describe, it is a place where “heart work” is done…where spirituality and psychology collide. It is a place where Truth is revealed about who I am and who God is. This place is a place of trust…of prayers sent up fervently and with hope, a place where I cannot go forward on my own strength, but one in which I have to believe His promises.

I know He loves me.
I know He is sovereign.
I know He is my Redeemer.
I know He hears me when I call upon Him.

Looking at the diagram, stages 5 & 6 loom ahead…I am not there, I am pretty sure. There is a lot more decluttering of unresolved issues between me & God, between me & me, between me & my husband…I’ll be hanging out here for a while, I am pretty sure.

And that is okay… He promises me this...

“For I know the plans I have for you,"

declares the LORD,

"plans to prosper you and not to harm you,

plans to give you hope and a future.

Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.”
Jeremiah 29:11,12

2007-05-19T17:20:00.000-05:00

Like a Good Neighbor...State Farm is There

So, did ya ever have one of those days? You know, a day that you couldn't have made up for the pure comical entertainment of your readers...a fictional experience that is really non-fiction?

Wednesday was one of those days for me. I'm still traumatized, only today can I finally write about it.

The day began like any lovely spring day...wake up, throw on some running clothes, get the kids ready for school, cook up a pan of delicious oatmeal and chase it down with some leaded coffee (unleaded a.k.a. decaf is a waste of time to me) and head out the door in the nick of time to get my little learners to their appropriate learning places.

But something in the cosmos must have shifted around 9:23am...

So, here's the thing....My husband travels often, sometimes for up to a week at a time, sometimes overnight. He spent Tuesday night in Omaha and was due back in town after lunch. Our minivan was in the shop due to some transmission issues...so with the minivan on the skids, I was driving our little Subaru wagon to carpool, etc. (you'd be surprised how many kids you can pack in a four door with a hatchback.)

I have been trying to lose some weight (actually a lot of weight, but that's for another blog) so I stopped at one of the parks in town with a beautiful lake and nice, wide path to run on for my daily run/walk. I am not one to lock vehicles....no one is going to bother my stuff, right?...but for some reason I chose to lock the Subaru--with the panic mode on. I put the remote transmitter on a carabiner and clasped it to the waistband of my shorts, safe and secure. Not quite.

I finished my run/walk thirty minutes and 6 songs later...only to find the remote was gone. My key for the Subaru, the garage door opener (for my locked house), my cell phone and my wallet were safely locked in the four door hatchback. It was 10:15 and I needed to pick up daughter #3 from preschool by 11:30. Peachy. I turned around and began to retrace my steps....quickly. The whole time I am trying to troubleshoot a very bad situation...no keys, no friends to call because I have none, no cell phone anyway--locked in the Subaru...and then it hit me.

A mere city block away was our State Farm agent. You know the song....like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Hum it. After making it around the lake (again) I booked it to Chuck's office and was greeted by smiling faces (eager to help) and a bottle of cold water with Chuck's beaming face on it. I choked out my situation and before I could finish the receptionist was calmly dialing a locksmith. Chuck gave me his keys to pick up my dear daughter and I was off to preschool...on time!

Jimmy, the locksmith, got the Subaru unlocked about an hour later and brought the key to the State Farm office where daughter #3 and I had been waiting. Chuck wrote a check to pay for the locksmith and gave me a ride back to the park. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.

Now this little ditty isn't about State Farm or having great insurance coverage, it's not about my crazy misfortune and it's not even about locksmiths. It's about gratitude.

Remember how I mentioned earlier the beautiful park, the lake...yada, yada. I love living here and I love our neighborhood, the park, the lake, our home, my job, the schools and teachers my children have, the friends my kids have made...so I am thankful. Very thankful. And as I was running, I was thanking God for all He has provided over the year since we have moved to Lincoln. Little did I know....

And I am thankful for Chuck, our State Farm agent who I picked out of a phone book, who when we met with him last year told us a story about how one of his insured had just purchased a new Lexus and as she headed back to Texas with it hit a deer in the dusk of the evening and then called him at home and he left his house in the middle of the night to help her and...well it was a great story, but I was pretty convinced I would never need Chuck to go to such lengths to help me...little did I know.

Chuck would say it was nothing. But to me, whose husband was 60 miles away, whose keys were locked in the Subaru with her wallet and cell phone, who is still new to town and has yet to make any real good friends, whose little daughter #3 who does not like to be picked up late...it was something. Because Chuck says what he means and means what he says I was able to get back into my car and continue with my day. And for Chuck and his word, Lord, I am thankful.

2007-05-13T22:13:00.000-05:00

Mother's Day 2007

Madre, mom, mommy, mother, ma...nothing is sweeter to my ears than being called "mom" by one of my girls. I confess I only really considered myself a mom until the last year or so...sounds crazy, since my oldest is fifteen years old. But when I think of mom, I think of my own mother who died when I was nineteen. That is who mom is...I'm Ann, the daughter. It's not that I don't love my children (I do) or love being a mom (I love that, too), but when I look in the mirror I still see the eighteen year old girl who lived, loved and slept sports. I still see the girl who loved to spend all afternoon shooting baskets or inventing new games to play with her brothers. I still see the girl who dreams about what she wants to be when she grows up. Who me? Mom? No, that's Bernita, that's mom, I'm Ann, the daughter.

I think this year has really been a turning point. I don't know if turning 40 has anything to do with it. Or that my firstborn is a freshman in high school and my youngest starts kindergarten in August. But when I look in the mirror I don't see the eighteen year old girl in the basketball uniform...I see Mom. Of course I still love to shoot baskets (and hit volleyballs and go on long runs), invent new games to play with my kids and I am still dreaming about what I want to be when I grow up...but I am the Mom now...I am the Mom.

2007-04-08T16:21:00.000-05:00

Happy Day

The greatest day in history, Death is beaten, You have rescued me
Sing it out Jesus is alive
The empty cross, the empty grave, Life Eternal You have won the day
Shout is out Jesus is alive…He’s alive

And oh happy day happy day, You washed my sin away
Oh happy day happy day, I’ll never be the same
Forever I am changed

When I stand in that place, Free at last meeting face to face
I am Yours, Jesus You are mine, Endless joy, perfect peace
Earthly pain finally will cease, Celebrate, Jesus is alive
He’s alive

An oh happy day happy day, You washed my sin away
Oh happy day happy day, I’ll never be the same
Forever I am changed

Oh what a glorious day, What a glorious way
That You have saved me, And oh what a glorious day
What a glorious Name

What a glorious, glorious day
I’ll never be the same

Tim Hughes and Ben Cantelon

2007-03-31T12:55:00.000-05:00

One of the hardest things about moving has been the loss of close girlfriends. I'm not one of those girls who has always had a posse of friends, just one or two with whom I can share some of my deeper thoughts. I have not given “friendship development” the highest prayer devotion. I mean I have had my hands full this past year with nurturing my husband and children in this new life in Nebraska and praying for more relationships to commit time and energy to has not been a priority. I have reminded myself the Lord provides friendships and the precious ones He has provided have been gifts. God has placed two ladies in my life that I have felt a connection with and I have the privilege of having them over for tea this week. I am praying that our time of fellowship would be an encouragement to each other.

I so enjoy inviting people into my home. I like providing a comfortable environment, an attentive ear and delicious brewed tea for my family or special guest. However, one hurdle that has made hospitality non existent since our move has been CHAOS. I have not been able to get myself and family into a rhythm so that there is peace and order in my home...until recently. With the help of Flylady and Dr. Randy Carlson I am back on track, so to speak. I tend to procrastinate and mis-priortize my days, leaving those I care about most (and myself) with little of my genuine attention or time. Both Marla Cilley and Randy Carlson have used the power of the media (radio, internet, publishing) to help people like me lead focused, productive, God-honoring lives.

By following routines and living an intentional life there is peace in my heart and home. My eyes focus on Christ and not on the CHAOS that is around me. So this week as I invite my new friends into my clean, orderly home I am thankful for the ministries of Marla and Randy, for their devotion and love of the Lord and others. I am able to focus on my guest, not on clutter.

If you are like me, "sidetracked Sally", as my dear husband sometimes lovingly calls me, I encourage you to visit Flylady and Randy Carlson’s websites or listen to their radio show. Their encouragement, honesty and wisdom can provide you with the direction and focus you need to grow into the person God has designed you to be.

(Above image from Pottery Barn website)

2007-03-27T23:13:00.000-05:00

Reading is Fundamental…

Do you remember the RIF commercial when you were a kid? I remember the big van and the people in the commercial giving books away to kids. Imangine that! Free books! I have always loved reading, but actually being intentional about what I read only began when I was pregnant with my oldest daughter. I bought What to Expect When You’re Expecting and read it cover to cover. It was my mothering manual along with You are Your Child’s First Teacher (Rahima Baldwin) back in the early Mommy Years. I really wanted to be a good mommy and then in 1993 after I began following Christ, I really, really wanted to be a good mommy so the book reading about parenting exploded.

I still love to read non-fiction. I am a pretty practical person, so if I am going to burn daylight reading I had better be able to actually use the information I am consuming. You will notice my NF list is about twice as long as my fiction list. I have chosen my fiction books with great intention, hoping they will also have a utilitarian, usefulness about them. I also hope they are entertaining, I can certainly use a little less utilitarianism in my life, too.

So, in no particular order, here is my Spring Reading Thing 2007 reading list…

Non Fiction

The Treasure Principle by Randy Alcorn
My husband and I are just finishing a Crown Study and this book seems like a perfect way to end the course.

The Power of a Praying Parent by Stormie Omartian
I have had this book on my shelf for a long time and am more convicted than ever to F.I.N.I.S.H. it!

Crazy Horse by Mari Sandoz
Because I want to learn more about Nebraska and the people who live here.

The Power of Play: How Spontaneous, Imaginative Activities Lead to Happier, Healthier Children by David Elkind
This book looked interesting to me. Our philosophical approach, I guess, is that our girls have as much free time as possible to enjoy playing with each other and their friends. We provide a rich environment with dress up stuff, dolls, trucks, boxes, rocks, dirt and open space and let them fill in the blanks.

Queen Bees and Wannabes by Rosalind Wiseman
Being the mother of three girls, this book looked like it could provide some insight into the world of girls and their relationships with others.

12 Steps to Becoming a More Organized Woman by Lane P. Jordan
I love reading books on organizing and I have been slugging through this very handy book for a while.

The Best Life Diet by Bob Greene
I am choosing to live in a more healthy way…after having the babies I have slipped in my healthy habits…this book seemed honest and refreshing. I just wish the D word wasn’t in the title. I don’t believe in diets.

Having a Mary Spirit: Allowing God to Change Us from the Inside Out by Joanna Weaver
The back of the book reads: “You long to serve God with grace and strength, to reflect Christ in every word and action. Yet you find yourself continually struggling to bring that vision to life in your daily walk. At our very core, every one of us is a “twisted sister” within whom the flesh and disconnect between our good-girl desire to put Jesus first and our bad-girl realities that crowd our thoughts and push Him out of the way.” Yup…that sounds like me.

Body Clutter: Love Your Body, Body Yourself by Marla Cilley and Leanne Ely
I have followed Marla and the FlyLady Routines for years, she has been a wonderful blessing to our family!

To Know Him by Name by Kay Arthur and Timothy Botts
The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous runs into it an is safe. Proverbs 18:10

I Feel Bad About My Neck and Other Thoughts on Being a Woman by Nora Ephron
Sleepless in Seattle, When Harry Met Sally and You’ve Got Mail are favorite chick flicks of mine…as a woman of a certain age as well, this book seems very entertaining.

Fiction

The Giver by Lois Lowry
I have a friend who asked me to read this with her. I guess it is a banned book in many schools. I feel kind of like a rebel reading a banned book.

Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Patersen
I am intrigued by the movie, but I want to read the book first.

Light from Heaven by Jan Karon
I have read the Mitford series and enjoyed it immensely. I look forward to reading this in early June, just after the school year ends.

Big Stone Gap by Adriana Trigiani
The New York Times Book Review comment: “as comforting as a mug of chamomile tea on a rainy Sunday” and USA Today writes: "BIG STONE GAP is as comforting as a patchwork quilt, as charming as a country cottage. Readers would do well to fall into the nearest easy chair, cup of tea in hand, and savor the story of Ave Maria Mulligan." Sounds like my kind of story.

The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck
A classic I haven’t read but am looking forward to devouring over the next few weeks.

2007-03-27T19:48:00.000-05:00

Spring is on its way when...

The morning alarm becomes thunderstorms punctuated with lightning strikes.

Flowers begin peeking out from the mulch that was laid last fall.

The shelves in Wal-Mart's seasonal aisle are filled with sidewalk chalk, jumpropes and hula-hoops.

You are washing fewer socks because the kids are wearing flip flops or going bare foot.

You stock up on Shout and Oxyclean to get the mud stains out of the children's clothes.

The mailman delivers more garden and seed catalogs than bills.

Your carpet becomes a new color...muddy taupe.

Your little ones come running in the house with a fist full of the first flowers of spring...dandelions.

You hear the distant whack of baseballs at the neighborhood ball diamond.

Windows are thrown open at the first sign of temperatures above 60 degrees and fresh air fills the house.

You start visiting all the "organizing" websites for spring cleaning ideas.

Spring cleaning lasts about a day as the kids and the dog drag half of the garden over your freshly washed kitchen floors.

2007-03-14T14:21:00.000-05:00

Spring is just around the corner and one of my favorite verses comes to mind...

"Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail.

They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness."
Lamentations 3:22-23

I love that about God, every morning is new. I think that is why I love mornings, Mondays, the first day of the month, the first day of the year...and birthdays. I look forward to the newness, to a fresh start. I am so thankful God is faithful to renew His compassions each morning, He doesn't have to but in His infinite loving kindness He does.

Amen.

2007-03-13T04:15:00.000-05:00

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

2007-01-08T18:41:00.000-06:00

This is what writer's block looks like in your brain.

2006-07-27T22:03:00.000-05:00

It's a boy!!!

Puppy that is. Kona arrived at our home in July and life hasn't been the same. He is a smart lil' chocolate lab that has all of us going "awww, isn't that cute!" at his every whimper.

Of course lil' labs grow up to be big 70 pound labs, so we are busy training him to be a well trained dog. He is almost housebroken (only 40,000 more poops and pees to clean up), can sit, lay down and will stay on command. It is so gratifying as a parent to have at least one member of the family unit that obeys the first time! :)

2006-07-26T14:24:00.000-05:00

You know it's summer when...

The aroma of tanning oil and sunscreen is stronger than the cinnamon roll scented candle burning on the mantle.

Homemade ice cream becomes an entree.

You don't match up socks in the laundry anymore because everyone (except Daddy) runs around barefoot or wearing flip-flops.

There is always time for one more bike ride before bedtime.

Kool aid packets litter the counter after kids come in from the outdoors to make yet another pitcher of the lime green stuff.

The pool bag remains packed and ready at the door 24/7.

The most exciting event on Saturday morning is making it the farmers market just as it opens to beat the midmorning heat.

Time takes on a new dimension as days get longer and warmer.

The grill cover is never replaced because something is cooked on it everyday.

Suddenly you are scouring all of your cookbooks and the internet for one more recipe for zucchini.

Searching for a shady area to park your minivan while shopping at Wal-Mart resembles the hunt for Sasquatch.

You are more willing to swing a little longer, walk a little slower and breathe a little deeper.

2006-04-21T09:58:00.000-05:00

Lost!!
Well, no I am not currently lost, at least not technically. I walked daughter #2 to school today, much to her glee! She is an outdoors girl and walking to school offers so much adventure, even if it is just a few blocks. My motivation to walk to school is a little more practical...$3/gal gasoline. Can I get an amen, sister?
So, in my sidetracked way of doing things I decide to multitask and call my accountability partner while daughter #3 and I are walking home.
Our conversation is light, yet purposeful. We discuss what is going on in each other's lives, share prayer requests, laugh and admonish one another. Giving full attention to the conversation, I walked and talked and walked and talked right past my home! When I realized what was happening I surveyed the scene. Being new to the area I kind of knew where I was...but I didn't have my van with the compass in it so I needed to stop multitasking (i.e. get off the phone) and focus! Daughter #3 assessed the situation and concluded we were lost. I looked around & figured out where we were which wasn't really too far from home.
I knew how to get home, but something kind of profound hit me. Daughter #3 doesn't have a clue how to get home. She can't read and looks at the world from 36" from the ground besides not having a built in GPS system. I pondered this thought for a minute. I was once in a situation like that--lost. I didn't have a clue how to get home. My directions home came from my loving Father in His written Word. He provided the compass, the GPS system...the way home. Today I am not lost, today I have a Compass that lives within me, thank you Jesus, thank you for leading me home.

2006-04-20T13:16:00.000-05:00

I wanted to, but I didn't. We just moved to Nebraska and my basement is filled with boxes. Specifically boxes of books. Good books. Like Sense & Sensibility, Core 5 readers from Sonlight, my journals, nursing textbooks. There's at least 20 small boxes of books lovingly packed by the movers just waiting to be liberated from their corrugated jail. Last night I was looking for The Complete Book of Running for Women by Claire Kowalchik...I want/need to get back to running & this book is awesome encouragement. I eagerly ripped the tape off two boxes, briefly poked around and set them aside. I began to eye a third box when common sense took hold and I stopped. It was 2300 at night...I can't run at 0530 if I stay up much later no matter how motivated I am. I briefly calculated the odds of actually finding said book and concluded I had better odds at winning the lottery. So, I packed it in. I did find The Complete Guide to Pilates, Yoga, Meditation and Stress Relief, no doubt a bargain from the Dusty Bookshelf and one of my favorite books Celebrating the Christian Year by Martha Zimmerman. I was content with these two treasures so I lumbered quietly up the stairs looking through the pages. As I slipped under the covers to read, I promised myself I would launch into the rest of the boxes tomorrow.

2006-04-19T11:50:00.000-05:00

Okay, so if you want a good laugh and need some entertainment, watch this blog. I am teaching myself how to use this communication tool and I think the learning curve is going to be pretty steep. Most of the FAQ topics i don't even understand what they are and I just figured out what a template is. HTML, URL, links, edits...whatever! I will persevere and in one year i hope to have enough information that this tool will be more useful and less energy consuming for me.

I have been checking out the community and its pretty interesting to see what people will post to go out into cyberspace. There is a lot about blog etiquette, how to write something interesting, yada yada yada. A couple sites suggested using the "f" word a lot...to get some reaction. I don't think my English Comp teacher at Colorado State would agree and it is possible she could miraculously run across this site...don't think i will do that one. The best advice i have read so far suggests not to post anything you would not want your mother to read or to be on the front page of the NY Times. That's a good, simple common sense rule. I like it.

This morning my mind was racing with all kinds of topics to write about so I put them in my notebook and I will start with those ideas. I am excited, energized and randomly focused so this tool will be a great creative outlet for me...I hope in the process others will be slightly amused and entertained, hopefully not annoyed.

2006-04-11T12:00:00.000-05:00

Okay, so now i have figured out how to post pictures. Cool. This lovely photo is an aspen leaf taken last summer in Colorado, our second home.

2006-04-11T11:15:00.000-05:00

Why do kids like bandaids so much?

Last night after a period of stillness in my usually busy home I found my 3 y.o. Emily sitting on the floor in front of our linen closet. The linen closet is also home to our first aid kit, medicine kit and a plethora of items that didn't fit anywhere else. FYI safety moms--all dangerous items are well above my children's theoretical reach.

As i approach the wee one i hear her breathing a little heavy and she is intently focused on something in her hands. She has a Hello Kitty bandaid mangled by her attempts to open the child/adult proof wrapper. Why are bandaids so much more difficult to open now compared to when we were kids? Remember the cool little red string that you used to tear the side of the package? The red string is no more and one must be rather dextrous to open the little wrapper now.

Emily's explanation for the need of the band aid was demonstrated as she showed off the slight scuff on her elbow that needed immediate care and the Hello Kitty band aid was the cure. I helped her open the package and she deftly applied the bandage to her ouchy.

We must go through bandaids faster than we go through gallons of milk. Not only do the girls use them, but the cat and Bitty Baby have been known to sport a bandaid as well. The bandage is excellent for a scratch or cut, especially if it is bleeding, we all know that. But bandaids can cure bruises, headaches and hurt feelings, too. I have often wondered if a sticker would serve the same purpose, but when actually applying this theory I was shot down by my hurt little patient. No a sticker won't do, only a bandage emblazoned with Dora, Sponge Bob, Hello Kitty or in an emergency Mom's hand drawn smiley face.

So, as i expected, this morning Emily announced the ouchy was better. Thanks to Hello Kitty and the inventor of the Band Aid bandage.

2006-04-08T21:52:00.000-05:00

I have been blog crusing this evening and have deemed this blog dull. I have a lot to say, just not sure how or what to say. My husband observed once that my thoughts are so random, bordering on schizophrenic. True, I say. I am interested in so many things, from cooking to antiques to sewing and knitting. I ran today and that was a good thing. I am confident a daily dose of sweat and muscular pain delivered by thirty minutes on a treadmill is just as good as one celexa p.o. QD.

I think as I commit to writing, which i love to do, my blog will become more interesting. People are interesting anyway...don't you think? I mean, we all have a story to tell. I think this blog is a great way to tell not only my story, but the stories of those around me, too.

2006-04-08T21:46:00.000-05:00

Out of the Mud

2006-03-29T23:18:00.000-06:00

It's a funny thing, spinning all these plates. Raising the next generation, being a life partner, providing healthcare, honoring my parent, living in peace with the neighbors.
I want to teach the world to sing, in perfect harmony...la, la, la, la, la. I can't remember the rest, but it was a great song.