Christmas Greetings

May the hope and peace of Christmas be yours today and always.

It’s 4:28 a.m. and…

…for some Blessed reason I am awake…not that I have been sleeping and am now awake…but that I am awake because I have not been sleeping.

I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!

I stumbled on Confessions of a Pioneer Woman last week, bookmarked it to come back to when I had time because I knew I would need time to read it. I knew if I started reading I wouldn't be able to stop…so when I started reading at 1am I foolishly promised myself I would "stop" after "just a couple entries." Liar. I am a sucker for a good love story…but even more so when it is a real one. I like real. I like authenticity and I like practical. Being awake now and not having been asleep when I should have been is not exactly practical…but just one more entry…


I have discovered the Holy Grail of love stories in the blogosphere and because you are my friend, you one reader out there, I'm going to tell you about what I have discovered…Confessions of a Pioneer Woman's story of how she met and fell in love with her Marlboro Man…Black Heels to Tractor Wheels: A Love Story. It's the epic saga of 'city girl finds love in the Oklahoma prairie':

As our eleventh anniversary approaches, I find myself reflecting on the circumstances that brought Marlboro Man and me together. So grab a Diet Dr. Pepper, hang on to your hat, and come along for the ride!

I started with the beginning sans Diet Dr. Pepper (eww), and read all the way to here. The best place to begin is with the archives, though. All the posts are in one spot and you can read 'til your heart's content. Just so you know…she's not done, it's a work in progress and you'll have to wait patiently for the next installment…and you don't know when she'll write…or how long it will be…but it's worth the wait.

If you decide to jump in…a few words of caution:

1. If you love good photography, especially of cattle, cowboys, kids, horses and prairie…make sure you have ample time to visit her site…you'll be there a while.


2. If you have a rich sense of humor, enjoy good writing and witty redheads…make sure you have ample time to visit, you'll be there a while.


3. If you are (even in the loosest sense) a 'foodie' you will find yourself compelled to visit P-dub's other site The Pioneer Woman Cooks…make sure you have ample time to visit, you'll be there a while.

Find, steal, beg or borrow the time…and enjoy. 

What We Did on Our Snow Day

Make a scrapbook!

Works for Me Wednesday…Holiday Music on Pandora

Do you love music?

I do!! Can't sing much, can't play much, but I do listen much. I especially love holiday music playing in my home while I busy myself with crafts, cooking and kids! As much as I love holiday music, how many versions of "O Holy Night" can there be? And how many ways can "What Child is This" be arranged and performed…tastefully? And my poor Amy Grant holiday CDs are so scratched from being drug from the van to the house to the playroom…do I really want to buy another copy (my 3^rd) only to listen to it for about 13 more days? Hmm…how to solve the dilemma?

Dilemma solved…Pandora radio from the Music Genome Project is a free internet radio site I discovered last summer:

Pandora is a music discovery service designed to help you enjoy music you already know, and to help you discover new music you'll love. It's powered by the most comprehensive analysis of music ever undertaken, the Music Genome Project: a crazy project started back in early 2000 to capture the complex musical DNA of songs using a large team of highly-trained musicians. Just tell us one of your favorite songs or artists and we'll launch a streaming station to explore that part of the musical universe. The name Pandora means "all gifted" in Greek. In ancient Greek mythology, Pandora received many gifts from the gods, including the gift of music, from Apollo. She was also, as we all know, insatiably curious. Unlike those gods of old, however, we celebrate that virtue and have made it our mission to reward the musically curious among us with a never-ending experience of music discovery. It's also important to note that at the bottom of Pandora's box was Hope...

I have had the pleasure of listening to many of my favorite musical genres…folk, country, contemporary Christian, '80s, classical, alternative, jazz. Registration is free, I don't receive tons of annoying emails or spam and if you hear a song you absolutely have to own Pandora has links to itunes and amazon. Register (for free) and begin creating your own radio station. No commercials, family friendly and only the music you like! You guide Pandora with thumbs up or down to the next song! The FAQ link here can answer any questions you might have regarding registration, music licensing, software or hardware requirements, etc.

And Pandora's latest and greatest addition…holiday music!! I don't have to purchase anything, yet I am able to enjoy my favorite holiday music from Amy Grant, Michael W. Smith, Josh Groban, Manheim Steamroller, John Tesh and other favorites while discovering new artists…commercial free. I am hooked!

Rocks in My Dryer hosts Works for Me Wednesday…this is my first time participating, although I have lurked for a long time. Follow the link to see other creative ideas from Works for Me Wednesday bloggers. You will soon see why this blog carnival continues to grow and grow and grow…

Advent Conspiracy…

There's a conspiracy underway…and I don't think it will end anytime soon.

I think we could agree we are all on a journey, searching…and it seems the holiday season exacerbates this searching feeling inside.

Unless the searching feeling has been satisfied. By the One who satisfies.


The One who satisfies came to us as a babe in a manger over 2000 years ago; today we celebrate His birth as Christmas. Maybe it's me, but somewhere along the way celebrating Christ's birth (aka Christmas) was hijacked by the searching monster. In the United States the "holiday season" begins at Halloween (or before), is punctuated by the Big Feast (aka Thanksgiving) in which we gorge ourselves on scandalous amounts of food and ends with the grand finale on Christmas Day. For many, Christmas Day has become a fest of consuming…of spending scandalous amounts of money on stuff we don't really need in search of something we really do need. We make our lists, check them twice and head out to Wal*mart in search of…something.

Christ's birth (aka Christmas) was meant to transform the world…not our credit rating. Why all this consuming during the holiday season? And it's not just about buying gifts, either. There's the new pots and pans to be purchased to cook all the extra food we are cooking, the new furniture for the people who are coming to visit…there's the new clothes to buy for the parties we have to attend…there's the wrapping paper and tape and ribbons to buy to wrap all the gifts we've purchased. And the $29.99 gallon of peanut oil to fry the $10.00 turkey. But you can use the oil over and over. Who fries food these days besides McDonald's?

Now, I may be preaching to the choir…or maybe I'm just talking out loud to myself…you may have all this figured out. But way back in early October, I was shopping the local *big box discount store* for Halloween candy and I noticed Christmas décor and stuff in the aisle next to the princess and fairy costumes. The confused look on my face must have mirrored that on my children's. "What's the Christmas stuff for Mommy?" "Oh, it just wouldn't be Halloween without a few Christmas decorations, would it, honey?" I decided I had had enough of the whole holiday consumer scene.

What if, as followers of Christ we would treat the holidays as the Holy Days they are? What if we would consider stopping the busyness…to slow down and listen to the One who satisfies? What if our transformed hearts would focus out on others, sharing the Hope that satisfies? This sounds great; you say…I want something different this year…but how?

Advent Conspiracy is a great place to start. Advent Conspiracy is an international movement restoring the scandal of Christmas by worshipping Jesus through compassion, not consumption. This page has some specific ideas for relational giving.

What Would Jesus Buy? is a secular docu-comedy about the commercialization of Christmas. It's from producer Morgan Spurlock ("Super size Me") and has received very positive reviews from Christianity Today and Beliefnet.com among others.

Catalyst Church in Kent, Ohio has taken the Advent Conspiracy to a new level…check out Christmas in Kent.org.

Rick McKinley's blog (Imago Dei Community) is here…read The Baby is Coming and check out Imago Dei's site.

Darryl at DashHouse.com has posted his column from Christian Week.

Here in my town three churches have formed Christmas on 84^th Street…here's the site for inspiration.

Inspiration for Celebrating Christ in Your Home:


What about Santa Claus? We began celebrating Saint Nicholas Day many years ago. Pastor Ralph Wilson at Joyful Heart Renewal Ministries has written a lovely article about Nicholas, find it here. Many of you may already know the story, I had never heard "the truth about Santa" until I was a Christ follower! For details on our family St. Nicholas celebration see Treasured Traditions.

And this link to Simpleliving.org is a wonderful Epiphany resource…a great way to signify the close of the Christmas season.

Joanne at The Simple Wife has an Advent Countdown with daily treasures to share with her children. The project page has the how-to. I love the simplicity and the message…this project reminds me of Resurrection Eggs…but that's for another special Holy Day!

A Season of Gratitude

Over the past weeks I have been writing down what I am giving thanks for this season…

I am thankful for God and all that He is…I am thankful for His gift of grace and mercy to me… for family and friends He has provided…my husband and our daughters…a healthy holiday for our family…our home…for financial provision to pay off debt…for my calling as a mother and wife and nurse…for being part of a church home here in Nebraska…I am thankful for the friendships we have made along the way and praying for new, deep friendships to walk along the road with…I am thankful for the first snow! and the firewood we were able to gather this summer to enjoy this winter…for being able to work part time so I can be home for the kids as much as possible…for the few days we were able to spend at Disneyland just before Christmas last year (before Emily's surprise surgery)…and for Christmas Day '06 with caring staff, nurses and doctors at Children's Hospital Orange County taking care of Emily (and us)…and for the love and warmth we received from Orange County Ronald McDonald house…I am thankful Emily has recovered fully from surgery and she has remained free from any further complications from the tumor…I am thankful we have had the opportunity to give to others in need…and I am thankful this season of gratitude is not just a day or moment or calendar event, but an attitude of the heart. It is a heart attitude that's not "gutted out" or from following the latest three step self improvement plan, but a heart attitude graciously provided by a loving God who lives in me.

Check out these promises…

 “I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean;I will cleanse you from all your impurities and from all your idols.I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you;I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.And I will put my Spirit in you and move youto follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws.You will live in the land I gave your forefathers;you will be my people, and I will be your God.”Ezekiel 36:25-28

Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire…

I am very excited to be participating in BooMama's Christmas Tour of Homes this year. There's going to be lots of folks joining in on the fun…how about you? I have placed the bloggy button in the sidebar so you can click on over to BooMama's site to see what all the fuss is about!

There's going to be lots of laughter and fun, to be sure! Save the date…December 17^th and see what the internets are doing to celebrate the season!  Better yet, grab your camera, shoot some shots of your home and be a part of a blogosphere celebration!

Taking a Break

So my husband and I are on a mission, a gazelle like mission; to reduce debt and become better stewards of the treasures we have been given. Because I am a fairly intense person (I usually approach a project or idea with a full on intensity second to only to my pursuit of God) I have been reading just about anything I can get my hands on about living a simpler, more frugal life. A quick net search for personal finance blogs yielded some very informative and interesting sites. I have provided links to two sites I have visited and read fairly regularly in my sidebar, there are others I have found as well, but just haven't linked them yet.

A theme I have found to come up fairly frequently on many sites has been the conversation about stay at home parent vs working outside the home parent tangled up with the issue of childcare. A recent post at beingfrugal.net intrigued me enough to comment. Another site, brip, blap had a similar conversation going and I was decided to throw my two cents in as well. And finally, The Simple Dollar has a book club; we are reading Your Money or Your Life, by Dominguez and once again a post, or rather the comments following the post compelled me to join in the conversation.

I don't think this conversation (the stay at home parent vs. working outside the home parent) can ever fully be resolved, we are all much too stubborn and convicted in our own minds about what is right or wrong, even in the face of research and statistics.

The Truth About Me…part 2

The first time I learned The Truth About Me was the fall of 1993 and I was a single mom and a student at Colorado State University. I had made friends with Allison, who other than her annoying habit of bringing every conversation back Jesus, was on all accounts "normal". Our personalities seemed to click and we often sat for hours chatting while our children played together. Over the course of time, however a significant contrast between us became apparent. She had something I did not and I could see the difference lived out in her life and family…and on her face. Allison radiated Christ. Something happens when an unbeliever (me) spends time with someone who has the living God dwelling inside them (Allison). Either you are drawn the presence of the Holy Spirit in that person or the Presence is so uncomfortable for you that you find ways to avoid them or even end the relationship. I was drawn into His Presence.


Unbeknownst to me, God had been preparing my heart and He began to reveal Himself through my conversations with Allison. I had begun an inward journey and was searching for answers to the Big Questions. I was able to understand a lot about God but I had a hard time understanding on a deeper level I was separated from God. I knew I wasn't perfect, a quick survey of my present circumstances revealed that quite well, but understanding my "goodness" wasn't even close to being good enough for God…was disturbing.


My search led me to scripture and I was met by a holy God. Since I did not grow up "in the Church" reading the "great stories" of the Bible were fresh and new for me. Yet, I wanted to know why Knowing God made Alison so different from me knowing about God.


God met me in my little apartment in the evening hours as I read His Word. I remember the very moment when I realized I would one day give an account of myself to God…it was if time stopped. Every moment, every decision, every s.i.n. would be laid before me and I would be held accountable. I'm no mathematician, but on a deeper level I finally understood [my sin] > [all the good stuff I will ever do]. I was broken. I was afraid. I cried. I could feel my heart aching because I could see there was no way I was going to be able to fix the situation I was in.


It was Romans 14:11, 12 It is written: "'As surely as I live,' says the Lord, 'every knee will bow before Me; every tongue will confess to God.'" So then, each of us will give an account of himself to God
that brought me to my knees. I was absolutely powerless to remedy my situation. There existed a chasm between a holy God and me I was powerless to cross. There existed no action I could do to change this Truth and there was not one person on the planet that could help me. And in that moment I sensed I was alone with God.


I continued to read, flipping pages from Old Testament to New Testament…hoping to find something in the pages of scripture that would soothe the very real ache I held in my body. I quickly scanned Psalms and Proverbs. Nothing. I looked in Revelation…it was if it was written in Spanish. I read a little in Daniel, Isaiah, Jeremiah. It was fear that gripped me…the chasm could not be navigated by my good deeds, self-improvement techniques or promises to straighten up. I feared I was too late…and I feared God was too holy and I was too sinful.


With breathless hope I turned to the first chapter of Matthew and began to skim the pages. And then I read "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." I read it again. And again. And once again. I knew a moment of decision had come and I agreed with God about The Truth About Me. It was settled the chasm was closed and I ran to Him for the rest He promised. The ache was no longer there, it had been replaced by a sense of peace I had never before known. I was experiencing the unmerited grace of forgiveness from a holy God. I rested there, on the floor of my apartment for hours, in complete silence and awe.

The Truth About Me…part 1

In our small group we are reading a book that is having a rather profound impact on my heart and my relationship with Christ. It's called True Faced: Trust God and Others With Who You Really Are. This post won't really be a book review, but rather how God is using this book to teach me the Truth About Me.


In addition to reading Scripture, I can sincerely tell you I have read every "how to be a better Christian wife/mother/sister/hostess/football fan" book ad nauseum since I decided to follow Jesus in 1993. I am a full on kind of person and when I pursue something it is with passion and intention, thus the extensive reading list. But over the last couple of years, beginning probably around 2004ish I began to sense there must be something more, something I am missing…my relationship with my God seemed…distant. I wanted change, growth, maturity, holiness, godliness…to be like Christ, to be Godly, to live the disciplines…I wanted to please Him above all else.


For those of us on this journey of following Christ, the journey is one of choices. At some point between 1993 and the early 2000s I made a choice. I made a choice between two divergent paths in this journey with God: on the left-- the path of Pleasing God and on the right-- the path of Trusting God. There is no third choice; no "door #3" and one cannot jump back and forth between the two paths. These two paths represent the inner motives of the heart, the purpose behind the practice. Ultimately, motives become values and values become action. I chose the Pleasing God path. For me, the Trusting God path seemed so esoteric, so "out there", so intangible…and kind of scary. But the Pleasing God path is one of action, it is about experience, to many it's the sold out for God way to go! Passionately, I set my foot on this path and the journey began.


True Faced describes the Pleasing God path as one that leads to the Room of Good Intentions. Over the entrance to the room a sign reads "Striving to Be All That God Wants Me to Be" and to enter this room one must turn the knob of Effort. From the beginning of my walk my deepest desire has been to be the person God intends me to be, to be the person He has called me to be. It makes sense I would grab the Knob of Effort with gusto and walk right in. …I will be all He wants me to be…whatever it looks like, whatever it takes…I want to please Him! My walk with God will be just like in the books I've read, it will be like Paul and Peter, Ruth and Naomi. My goal is to be godly, I will persevere, I will be disciplined, I will fast and pray and do Bible Studies…and we will have this close relationship I have always wanted with God. And I became comfortable in the Room of Good Intentions…at least for a while. Then I got tired. Real tired. There seemed to be this rather uncomfortable, but permanent mask adhered to my face and on the faces of others in the room. When we inquire among each other "How is it going? How are you doing?" a pained "Everything's fine, just fine, we're doing good, yup, pretty good" echoes among us all in this Room of Good Intentions.


I lived in the Room of Good Intentions for quite some time…a looong time. I invested in relationships that seemed to go beyond the mask, but in Truth the masks remained. My experience in the Room of Good Intentions was littered with half used homeschool supplies, Bible Studies left incomplete, futile attempts at perfect tea parties, gallons of mismatched paints and fabric for decorating, scratched up mediocre Christian music CDs and multiple copies of the Bible in the search to find the most accurate version to carry to church. I began to feel stifled…the mask was on pretty tight. And I claimed to be authentic. I was tired. Very tired…of myself, of the others in the Room and of feeling like I was never doing enough, never getting it quite together. There always seemed to be this cloud over me, this nagging feeling I will never be the person God intends me to be. The intimate walk I thought I would experience after choosing Christ seemed to have faded into the pages of the well intentioned books I had read and placed upon the dusty bookshelves in the basement. All the concepts and strategies I had read about had ultimately left me…unchanged.


NOTE: Over the next few days/week I will be working through The Truth About Me….and I won't not post for months, I just need to process stuff a little…this is too exciting to keep inside, just getting it out in a coherent manner is a longer process than I thought… Jab

I moved!

New digs at Wordpress.com

http://outofthemud.wordpress.com/

See you there...I'm not all the way moved in, but make yourself at home anyway.

The Journey Inward...

Faith...my response to God’s presence in my life.

Journey…a process or pursuit.

This morning in Sunday School (actually it is called “Discovery Class” individuals considering membership at our church go through this class) we discussed a book titled The Critical Journey by Janet Hagberg and Robert Guelich (Second Edition, Sheffield Publishing 2005). In the book, the authors examine the journey we embark upon when we respond to the presence of God in our lives. I have not read this book and this post is really just my thinking out loud...a lot of thought generated by a discussion and diagram.

The spiritual journey, as described by Hagberg and Guelich is based on the stage-model theory, of which I will direct you to this page for more on that topic and a more thorough discussion of the book by someone who has actually read the entire text.

Through the magic of computers, I was able to sort of reproduce the diagram from our handout.

All credit to the authors for the original and this reproduction.

The Wall…as shown in this diagram should really be a dark line only, but the idea remains. Most of us cycle from stage 2 to 3…learning and serving and learning and serving and…well you get the point. But, to grow, to journey deeper with God, we have to get past The Wall. And the only way out…is through.

And that is what got me to really thinking today... for some time now I’ve been hanging out at the Wall. The Wall is kind of comfortable, you don’t go too deep, don’t feel too much pain, you coast. I’ve been through the wall before, yes, but only long enough to journey inward and outward and back to learning and serving and learning and serving. In some ways, it has been an easy place to stay because going through the wall is not without pain. But remaining at the Wall is painful, too, because metaphorically you just “bang your head on it” but only hard enough to bruise yourself, not hard enough to actually break through…and that, my friend is misery.

My journey over the last two years (at least) has been a journey through the Wall. I mean I had been hanging out, like I said before, but I got bored, frustrated and miserable. I had been getting frustrated with the learning and serving routine, I did not believe the pinnacle of spiritual maturity rested in my “Christian Activity Resume.” I began to doubt and question what I believed; why I believed what I believed, wondered what was it that was truly essential in my relationship with Christ and what was clutter I picked up along the way. Was I a Christian or a Christ-follower…is there a difference? My quiet times seemed to be another activity to complete, rather than a time to connect with my Lord. I had been unsettled and restless. I yearned for something deeper, but was too fearful/lazy/comfortable/uncomfortable/proud to go through the Wall. It took a crisis to push me through…and then another one…and then another one.

I might not have known I was “at the Wall” but I did know I was not really growing or going deeper with God…and I wanted to, but knew it would take something more than just "wanting" it for true spiritual growth to happen. So I prayed. I asked God to do whatever it takes to draw me closer to Him…whatever it takes so that I would grow and trust Him more…whatever it looks like and whatever it takes…I yearned to be in a new place with Him.

That is a hard prayer to pray, but trusting Him is harder. I knew He would answer that prayer, I had no idea what the answer(s) would look like…I just had to trust Him.

So what happened?

On this journey inward there has been pain, loss, joy, peace, grace, sadness, fear, gratitude…you know, the messy stuff of life we all deal with. As I expected. But in this whole mess, I have experienced a deepness with the Lord I could have only experienced by journeying through the Wall. This place, which I think is stage 4, is hard to describe, it is a place where “heart work” is done…where spirituality and psychology collide. It is a place where Truth is revealed about who I am and who God is. This place is a place of trust…of prayers sent up fervently and with hope, a place where I cannot go forward on my own strength, but one in which I have to believe His promises.

I know He loves me.
I know He is sovereign.
I know He is my Redeemer.
I know He hears me when I call upon Him.

Looking at the diagram, stages 5 & 6 loom ahead…I am not there, I am pretty sure. There is a lot more decluttering of unresolved issues between me & God, between me & me, between me & my husband…I’ll be hanging out here for a while, I am pretty sure.

And that is okay… He promises me this...

“For I know the plans I have for you,"

declares the LORD,

"plans to prosper you and not to harm you,

plans to give you hope and a future.

Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.”
Jeremiah 29:11,12

Like a Good Neighbor...State Farm is There

So, did ya ever have one of those days? You know, a day that you couldn't have made up for the pure comical entertainment of your readers...a fictional experience that is really non-fiction?

Wednesday was one of those days for me. I'm still traumatized, only today can I finally write about it.

The day began like any lovely spring day...wake up, throw on some running clothes, get the kids ready for school, cook up a pan of delicious oatmeal and chase it down with some leaded coffee (unleaded a.k.a. decaf is a waste of time to me) and head out the door in the nick of time to get my little learners to their appropriate learning places.

But something in the cosmos must have shifted around 9:23am...

So, here's the thing....My husband travels often, sometimes for up to a week at a time, sometimes overnight. He spent Tuesday night in Omaha and was due back in town after lunch. Our minivan was in the shop due to some transmission issues...so with the minivan on the skids, I was driving our little Subaru wagon to carpool, etc. (you'd be surprised how many kids you can pack in a four door with a hatchback.)

I have been trying to lose some weight (actually a lot of weight, but that's for another blog) so I stopped at one of the parks in town with a beautiful lake and nice, wide path to run on for my daily run/walk. I am not one to lock vehicles....no one is going to bother my stuff, right?...but for some reason I chose to lock the Subaru--with the panic mode on. I put the remote transmitter on a carabiner and clasped it to the waistband of my shorts, safe and secure. Not quite.

I finished my run/walk thirty minutes and 6 songs later...only to find the remote was gone. My key for the Subaru, the garage door opener (for my locked house), my cell phone and my wallet were safely locked in the four door hatchback. It was 10:15 and I needed to pick up daughter #3 from preschool by 11:30. Peachy. I turned around and began to retrace my steps....quickly. The whole time I am trying to troubleshoot a very bad situation...no keys, no friends to call because I have none, no cell phone anyway--locked in the Subaru...and then it hit me.

A mere city block away was our State Farm agent. You know the song....like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Hum it. After making it around the lake (again) I booked it to Chuck's office and was greeted by smiling faces (eager to help) and a bottle of cold water with Chuck's beaming face on it. I choked out my situation and before I could finish the receptionist was calmly dialing a locksmith. Chuck gave me his keys to pick up my dear daughter and I was off to preschool...on time!

Jimmy, the locksmith, got the Subaru unlocked about an hour later and brought the key to the State Farm office where daughter #3 and I had been waiting. Chuck wrote a check to pay for the locksmith and gave me a ride back to the park. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.

Now this little ditty isn't about State Farm or having great insurance coverage, it's not about my crazy misfortune and it's not even about locksmiths. It's about gratitude.

Remember how I mentioned earlier the beautiful park, the lake...yada, yada. I love living here and I love our neighborhood, the park, the lake, our home, my job, the schools and teachers my children have, the friends my kids have made...so I am thankful. Very thankful. And as I was running, I was thanking God for all He has provided over the year since we have moved to Lincoln. Little did I know....

And I am thankful for Chuck, our State Farm agent who I picked out of a phone book, who when we met with him last year told us a story about how one of his insured had just purchased a new Lexus and as she headed back to Texas with it hit a deer in the dusk of the evening and then called him at home and he left his house in the middle of the night to help her and...well it was a great story, but I was pretty convinced I would never need Chuck to go to such lengths to help me...little did I know.

Chuck would say it was nothing. But to me, whose husband was 60 miles away, whose keys were locked in the Subaru with her wallet and cell phone, who is still new to town and has yet to make any real good friends, whose little daughter #3 who does not like to be picked up late...it was something. Because Chuck says what he means and means what he says I was able to get back into my car and continue with my day. And for Chuck and his word, Lord, I am thankful.

Mother's Day 2007

Madre, mom, mommy, mother, ma...nothing is sweeter to my ears than being called "mom" by one of my girls. I confess I only really considered myself a mom until the last year or so...sounds crazy, since my oldest is fifteen years old. But when I think of mom, I think of my own mother who died when I was nineteen. That is who mom is...I'm Ann, the daughter. It's not that I don't love my children (I do) or love being a mom (I love that, too), but when I look in the mirror I still see the eighteen year old girl who lived, loved and slept sports. I still see the girl who loved to spend all afternoon shooting baskets or inventing new games to play with her brothers. I still see the girl who dreams about what she wants to be when she grows up. Who me? Mom? No, that's Bernita, that's mom, I'm Ann, the daughter.

I think this year has really been a turning point. I don't know if turning 40 has anything to do with it. Or that my firstborn is a freshman in high school and my youngest starts kindergarten in August. But when I look in the mirror I don't see the eighteen year old girl in the basketball uniform...I see Mom. Of course I still love to shoot baskets (and hit volleyballs and go on long runs), invent new games to play with my kids and I am still dreaming about what I want to be when I grow up...but I am the Mom now...I am the Mom.

Happy Day


The greatest day in history, Death is beaten, You have rescued me
Sing it out Jesus is alive
The empty cross, the empty grave, Life Eternal You have won the day
Shout is out Jesus is alive…He’s alive

And oh happy day happy day, You washed my sin away
Oh happy day happy day, I’ll never be the same
Forever I am changed

When I stand in that place, Free at last meeting face to face
I am Yours, Jesus You are mine, Endless joy, perfect peace
Earthly pain finally will cease, Celebrate, Jesus is alive
He’s alive

An oh happy day happy day, You washed my sin away
Oh happy day happy day, I’ll never be the same
Forever I am changed

Oh what a glorious day, What a glorious way
That You have saved me, And oh what a glorious day
What a glorious Name

What a glorious, glorious day
I’ll never be the same

Tim Hughes and Ben Cantelon

One of the hardest things about moving has been the loss of close girlfriends. I'm not one of those girls who has always had a posse of friends, just one or two with whom I can share some of my deeper thoughts. I have not given “friendship development” the highest prayer devotion. I mean I have had my hands full this past year with nurturing my husband and children in this new life in Nebraska and praying for more relationships to commit time and energy to has not been a priority. I have reminded myself the Lord provides friendships and the precious ones He has provided have been gifts. God has placed two ladies in my life that I have felt a connection with and I have the privilege of having them over for tea this week. I am praying that our time of fellowship would be an encouragement to each other.

I so enjoy inviting people into my home. I like providing a comfortable environment, an attentive ear and delicious brewed tea for my family or special guest. However, one hurdle that has made hospitality non existent since our move has been CHAOS. I have not been able to get myself and family into a rhythm so that there is peace and order in my home...until recently. With the help of Flylady and Dr. Randy Carlson I am back on track, so to speak. I tend to procrastinate and mis-priortize my days, leaving those I care about most (and myself) with little of my genuine attention or time. Both Marla Cilley and Randy Carlson have used the power of the media (radio, internet, publishing) to help people like me lead focused, productive, God-honoring lives.

By following routines and living an intentional life there is peace in my heart and home. My eyes focus on Christ and not on the CHAOS that is around me. So this week as I invite my new friends into my clean, orderly home I am thankful for the ministries of Marla and Randy, for their devotion and love of the Lord and others. I am able to focus on my guest, not on clutter.

If you are like me, "sidetracked Sally", as my dear husband sometimes lovingly calls me, I encourage you to visit Flylady and Randy Carlson’s websites or listen to their radio show. Their encouragement, honesty and wisdom can provide you with the direction and focus you need to grow into the person God has designed you to be.

(Above image from Pottery Barn website)

Reading is Fundamental…

Do you remember the RIF commercial when you were a kid? I remember the big van and the people in the commercial giving books away to kids. Imangine that! Free books! I have always loved reading, but actually being intentional about what I read only began when I was pregnant with my oldest daughter. I bought What to Expect When You’re Expecting and read it cover to cover. It was my mothering manual along with You are Your Child’s First Teacher (Rahima Baldwin) back in the early Mommy Years. I really wanted to be a good mommy and then in 1993 after I began following Christ, I really, really wanted to be a good mommy so the book reading about parenting exploded.

I still love to read non-fiction. I am a pretty practical person, so if I am going to burn daylight reading I had better be able to actually use the information I am consuming. You will notice my NF list is about twice as long as my fiction list. I have chosen my fiction books with great intention, hoping they will also have a utilitarian, usefulness about them. I also hope they are entertaining, I can certainly use a little less utilitarianism in my life, too.

So, in no particular order, here is my Spring Reading Thing 2007 reading list…

Non Fiction

The Treasure Principle by Randy Alcorn
My husband and I are just finishing a Crown Study and this book seems like a perfect way to end the course.

The Power of a Praying Parent by Stormie Omartian
I have had this book on my shelf for a long time and am more convicted than ever to F.I.N.I.S.H. it!

Crazy Horse by Mari Sandoz
Because I want to learn more about Nebraska and the people who live here.

The Power of Play: How Spontaneous, Imaginative Activities Lead to Happier, Healthier Children by David Elkind
This book looked interesting to me. Our philosophical approach, I guess, is that our girls have as much free time as possible to enjoy playing with each other and their friends. We provide a rich environment with dress up stuff, dolls, trucks, boxes, rocks, dirt and open space and let them fill in the blanks.

Queen Bees and Wannabes by Rosalind Wiseman
Being the mother of three girls, this book looked like it could provide some insight into the world of girls and their relationships with others.

12 Steps to Becoming a More Organized Woman by Lane P. Jordan
I love reading books on organizing and I have been slugging through this very handy book for a while.

The Best Life Diet by Bob Greene
I am choosing to live in a more healthy way…after having the babies I have slipped in my healthy habits…this book seemed honest and refreshing. I just wish the D word wasn’t in the title. I don’t believe in diets.

Having a Mary Spirit: Allowing God to Change Us from the Inside Out by Joanna Weaver
The back of the book reads: “You long to serve God with grace and strength, to reflect Christ in every word and action. Yet you find yourself continually struggling to bring that vision to life in your daily walk. At our very core, every one of us is a “twisted sister” within whom the flesh and disconnect between our good-girl desire to put Jesus first and our bad-girl realities that crowd our thoughts and push Him out of the way.” Yup…that sounds like me.

Body Clutter: Love Your Body, Body Yourself by Marla Cilley and Leanne Ely
I have followed Marla and the FlyLady Routines for years, she has been a wonderful blessing to our family!

To Know Him by Name by Kay Arthur and Timothy Botts
The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous runs into it an is safe. Proverbs 18:10


I Feel Bad About My Neck and Other Thoughts on Being a Woman by Nora Ephron
Sleepless in Seattle, When Harry Met Sally and You’ve Got Mail are favorite chick flicks of mine…as a woman of a certain age as well, this book seems very entertaining.



Fiction

The Giver by Lois Lowry
I have a friend who asked me to read this with her. I guess it is a banned book in many schools. I feel kind of like a rebel reading a banned book.

Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Patersen
I am intrigued by the movie, but I want to read the book first.

Light from Heaven by Jan Karon
I have read the Mitford series and enjoyed it immensely. I look forward to reading this in early June, just after the school year ends.

Big Stone Gap by Adriana Trigiani
The New York Times Book Review comment: “as comforting as a mug of chamomile tea on a rainy Sunday” and USA Today writes: "BIG STONE GAP is as comforting as a patchwork quilt, as charming as a country cottage. Readers would do well to fall into the nearest easy chair, cup of tea in hand, and savor the story of Ave Maria Mulligan." Sounds like my kind of story.

The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck
A classic I haven’t read but am looking forward to devouring over the next few weeks.

Spring is on its way when...

The morning alarm becomes thunderstorms punctuated with lightning strikes.

Flowers begin peeking out from the mulch that was laid last fall.

The shelves in Wal-Mart's seasonal aisle are filled with sidewalk chalk, jumpropes and hula-hoops.

You are washing fewer socks because the kids are wearing flip flops or going bare foot.

You stock up on Shout and Oxyclean to get the mud stains out of the children's clothes.

The mailman delivers more garden and seed catalogs than bills.

Your carpet becomes a new color...muddy taupe.

Your little ones come running in the house with a fist full of the first flowers of spring...dandelions.

You hear the distant whack of baseballs at the neighborhood ball diamond.

Windows are thrown open at the first sign of temperatures above 60 degrees and fresh air fills the house.

You start visiting all the "organizing" websites for spring cleaning ideas.

Spring cleaning lasts about a day as the kids and the dog drag half of the garden over your freshly washed kitchen floors.

Spring is just around the corner and one of my favorite verses comes to mind...

"Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail.

They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness."
Lamentations 3:22-23

I love that about God, every morning is new. I think that is why I love mornings, Mondays, the first day of the month, the first day of the year...and birthdays. I look forward to the newness, to a fresh start. I am so thankful God is faithful to renew His compassions each morning, He doesn't have to but in His infinite loving kindness He does.

Amen.

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